Enneagram Teachers and Spotting the Green Flags
Written by Hanna B. Woody, Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor and certified Enneagram Teacher
In my last post I wrote about spotting red flags in Enneagram teachers. Over the years I’ve spent interacting with the Enneagram community on social media, in trainings, and through working with individuals who have encountered problematic teachers and coaches, I’ve witnessed that not every Enneagram professional in our community does a great job of not harming others. Sometimes this is just a reflection of their ego and lack of social emotional skills. Sometimes it’s because they are an abusive person seeking to have power over others. In my red flags post, I was essentially outlining signs of the first stages of narcissistic abuse and how it can manifest in spiritual teaching. The Enneagram community is not immune to problematic people. My hope is to educate others to see the red flags so they can practice caution and decide if they want to invest in that person or relationship. Watching for green flags can help you determine if you want to invest trust and proceed with an Enneagram professional.
Green Flags
They consistently treat you with kindness and respect.
They respect your time and follow through with what they say they are going to do.
When they make a mistake or cause harm, they hold themselves accountable. They don’t get defensive and belittle you or others for bringing it up.
They respect other Enneagram teachers and don’t disparage them even if they disagree with their theories. The discourse is respectful.
They respect the truths you communicate about yourself and your inner experience. They don’t attempt to tell you that you are wrong about yourself.
They are humble and know that they don’t know everything. They show this when they admit to not knowing the answer to a question.
Even if they are vastly more knowledgeable than you are in the Enneagram, the relationship feels respectful and equal. They aren’t holding themselves above you.
If they behave in a harmful way such as raging in anger at someone, they recognize the harm they did and don’t do it again. They don’t blame others for "making them" act that way.
They respect your boundaries and don’t belittle you for having them.
You feel heard, seen, and respected. You feel that your voice matters.
Watching for green and red flags is an incredibly useful skill for everyone because we will all come into contact with problematic people. For people who have experienced abuse before, it’s an essential skill. Whether you have experienced abuse in your childhood, adulthood, or both (because the abuse cycle tends to keep repeating itself) you may not see or react to red flags. It’s very common for abuse survivors to not see problematic behavior as a red flag. When I work with survivors, we talk about the reasons for this and work together to strengthen the skill of spotting green and red flags. This skill is essential to healing and to navigating a world full of problematic people.
Click here to learn about the red flags of Enneagram teachers.
Hanna Woody is a Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor in Asheville, North Carolina. She has over 12 years of professional counseling experience and specializes in breaking cycles of intergenerational trauma, childhood trauma, and the Enneagram. Certified in the Embodiment Tradition, she has over 150 hours of training and teaching experience. Hanna is in private practice and provides online mental health therapy, Enneagram coaching, and Enneagram training.